Episode 078: Showing Up When You’re Running on Empty

27 November 2024

You wake up, the alarm blares, and for a moment, you consider hitting snooze. The thought of starting the day feels like a monumental task. You’re tired—bone-deep tired—but the bills won’t pay themselves, the clients are waiting, and your family is relying on you. Sound familiar?

According to Mary Beth Braun, a professional coach and massage therapist, risk factors for overload burnout include “scheduling appointments too close together, working too many hours, and not getting enough rest and recovery.” Burnout in massage therapy is a common challenge, especially during the end-of-year rush. Recognising the signs and recharging is essential.

The end of the year often feels like the finish line of a marathon—a chaotic, relentless sprint where everyone, from caregivers to clients, seems to be running on fumes. For massage therapists, December is a perfect storm. Clients show up frazzled, venting about holiday plans, tight budgets, and hectic schedules. Meanwhile, we’re juggling our own struggles: financial obligations, emotional fatigue, and the mental weight of holding space for others.

“It’s not just the physical work,” David explains. “It’s navigating their illnesses, reschedules, and the emotional dumps they bring into the room. By the time December hits, it feels like we’re all given out.”

The reality is clear: caregivers often prioritise everyone else at the expense of themselves. But how do we keep showing up—for our clients, our families, and ourselves—when we’re barely holding on? Let’s explore the signs of burnout, the emotional toll of caregiving, and the practical ways to recharge and reignite your passion.

The End-of-Year Slump

December in Australia is uniquely intense. It’s not just the end of the work year; it’s summer, the school break, and the mad dash toward the holiday season. Many clients save their annual leave for this time, pushing through up to 46 straight weeks of work.

“It’s like boiling a frog,” Jackie explains. “That stress and fatigue build up slowly, and by December, you’re suddenly snappy, exhausted, and feeling like a bad person.”

Clients often bring that energy into the treatment room, seeking relief but inadvertently adding to the load therapists already carry. As caregivers, we naturally want to help, but “when you’re just as tired, it’s hard to meet their needs while balancing your own,” David admits.

The Challenges of Being Self-Employed

For self-employed therapists, the pressures can feel amplified. There’s no paid sick leave or backup staff. Everything—from booking appointments to rescheduling clients—falls on your shoulders.

Jackie shares a personal story: “I had gastro last week. I was lying in bed feeling absolutely shot, and I still had to text my clients to reschedule. Everyone was lovely about it, but it was a reminder of how isolating it can be.”

David reflects on the stark contrast with being an employee: “When you’re employed, you just call your boss, and they sort it out. As a business owner, it’s all on you—no sick leave, no fallback.” This lack of a safety net often leads to working through illness or exhaustion simply because the bills don’t stop.

Recognising the Signs of Burnout

Burnout doesn’t announce itself with flashing lights—it creeps in, subtle at first. By the time it’s noticeable, it’s already taken a toll. Some common signs include:

Physical exhaustion: Dragging through the day, even after rest.
Emotional detachment: Feeling indifferent toward clients or work you used to enjoy.
Irritability: Snapping at loved ones or struggling with patience.
Lack of motivation: Dreading work or questioning your goals.
Physical symptoms: Headaches, muscle tension, or chronic aches.

“It’s like catching a case of the blahs,” Jackie says. “You feel flat, wonder if you’ve lost your mojo, and maybe even question your career path.”

For massage therapists, burnout is often paired with compassion fatigue, a specific exhaustion tied to emotional caregiving. “Clients don’t just come for a massage—they come to unload their worries,” Jackie explains. “By the end of the year, it can feel like too much.”

Finding Joy Amid the Chaos

When burnout looms, resentment isn’t far behind—especially when financial stress enters the mix. “With the cost-of-living crisis, many therapists feel they can’t raise their prices, even as everything gets more expensive,” David says. “It’s hard not to feel resentment when clients talk about their cruises or office Christmas parties, and you’re barely keeping up.”

Resentment feeds burnout, but finding ways to reconnect with joy—no matter how small—can help.

Steps to Recharge

1. Plan and Book a Proper Break

A real break isn’t a luxury—it’s essential. “And I don’t mean staying home to catch up on chores,” Jackie says. “You need time to truly reset.”

David shares a story from a client: “She books a week every year at a caravan park just 25 minutes from home. She spends her days near the ocean, eating fish and chips, and catching up with friends. It’s not about the distance; it’s about the mindset.”

The key is to schedule something you can look forward to—a getaway, even if it’s close to home, that lets you disconnect from daily responsibilities.

2. Celebrate Small Wins

Small milestones matter. Jackie suggests creating meaningful rewards for yourself: “Whether it’s a massage, a new book, or a night out, celebrating progress—even the little things—helps make the tough days feel worthwhile.”

David has a different approach: “I save a little money each week to buy something I want—a gadget, a plant, or even a new bike part. It’s my way of reminding myself that my work has value.”

3. Reconnect with Hobbies

Hobbies can provide a vital mental reset. Jackie shares how her husband rediscovered Pokémon Go during the pandemic: “He loved it—walking every day and catching Pokémon became a joyful ritual.”

David finds joy in tinkering: “I recently rebuilt a vintage bike. It wasn’t about the bike—it was about the mindfulness of creating something.”

Even small creative pursuits, like colouring with kids or gardening, can help restore balance. “You don’t have to be good at it,” Jackie says. “It just has to bring you joy.”

4. Shake Up Your Work Routine

If monotony is part of the problem, it might be time to make some changes. “Refine your client list,” Jackie suggests. “Focus on the clients who energise you and the work you’re passionate about.”

David encourages therapists to share their passions: “If you love working with runners or pregnant clients, talk about it! Clients who align with your interests will find you.”

Taking a course or workshop can also help. “Learning something new not only improves your skills but connects you with others in the industry,” Jackie says.

5. Connect with Others

Isolation can magnify feelings of burnout. Jackie recommends connecting with fellow therapists or joining a local group. “Even something simple, like a coffee chat or a board game night, can remind you that you’re not alone.”

David agrees: “Spend time with people who uplift you. Nurture relationships that energise you, not ones that drain you.”

Realigning with Your Values

Sometimes, burnout stems from deeper misalignments—your work environment or schedule may not reflect your values. Jackie reflects on a past role: “The company’s values didn’t align with mine. It drained me emotionally, and I knew I had to leave.”

David shares a similar story: “I was miserable at my old job. My wife finally said, ‘Just quit—we’ll figure it out.’ That was the turning point for me.”

If your current situation isn’t working, consider what needs to change. Whether it’s redefining your practice, finding a new workplace, or adjusting your schedule, aligning with your values can reignite your sense of purpose.

Permission to Rest

As caregivers, we often prioritise productivity over rest, but Jackie reminds us: “Life isn’t meant to be all work. Rest is productive too.”

David encourages therapists to schedule downtime like they would any appointment. “It’s a commitment to yourself—and you’ve earned it.”

Moving Forward

The end-of-year slump is real, but it doesn’t have to define you. By taking small, intentional steps—planning a break, rediscovering joy, and aligning with your values—you can move through the exhaustion and into a new year with renewed energy.

“You’re not alone in this,” Jackie says. “We’re all feeling it, but we have the tools to navigate it together.”

So take this as your permission to prioritise yourself. Plan your joy, find your fun, and remember: you deserve it.

For further reading and support, consider exploring the following resources:

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